T.P.K. Henson

Controversial figure in the world of Tarvuism. A former Tarvuist Priestmunty, Henson (b. Tarvus [later Terry] Peter Knowlesly Henson 1937, Wisconsin, USA) turned his back on Tarvuism in 1984 after a major disagreement with the higher priests of Tarvuism regarding his finances.

Henson has since become something of a 'hate figure' to Tarvuists the world over. This is hardly surprising, as he has written a series of inflammatory books - beginning with the inflamatory 'T.A.R.V.U: The Anti Religion Vandals Unit' in 1987 - that attacked the religion, its beliefs and followers. Henson claimed financial irregularities amongst the organisation (although this has never been proved and indeed Henson lost a large court case with the Givil regarding this matter in 1996). More famously he claimed that Tarvu's real name was Abli-Telvit, and that he was actually just a shepherd and not the Lord. Furthermore, he claimed that Abli-Telvit (or Tarvu) murdered a man called Thibbes, who was a cow-herder. He also suggested that Tarvu preached the gospel of 'constant masturbation', and that The Tarvunical Commission was made up of 'a hotchpotch of masturbators'.

In 1990, during a live radio interview with London radio station, LBC, Henson made the outrageous claim that the Great Chabernackle had not been a great temple, rather a large brothel.

Two days after the broadcast Henson was attacked by dogs, unleashed by Florian Jutburg, a Belgian dog trainer. Henson needed weeks of reconstructive surgery to his bottom and groin, and successfully sued Jutburg for £300,000. The dogs were destroyed.

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Theology

Fiction