http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/ 2010-05-28T20:12:27+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/ http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/lib/images/favicon.ico text/html 2008-09-05T16:58:31+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=%27patti-patti%27&rev=1220630311&do=diff 'Patti-Patti', not to be confused with Patti-Patti (the game), is a Tarvunian word meaning flair or panache. King Pillip of Sliny had a great deal of 'Patti-Patti'. text/html 2008-10-10T19:58:09+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=23&rev=1223665089&do=diff Unlucky number for Tarvuists, after Tarvu lost his first mayoral campaign to Gibb by 23 votes. Also, 23 is the age at which Tarvu transformed into Barvu, and unleashed Barvuism into the world for a full year. Tarvuists never celebrate their 23rd birthday, and instead hold a sort of 'negative' birthday party (known as a 'Birthdimentiharbinge'), in which the birthday boy/girl renounces Barvu, and then gives presents to their loved ones and friends, which are then destroyed. text/html 2008-09-21T13:05:50+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=accepters&rev=1221998750&do=diff The Accepters is the name given to two very poor beggars, called Pok and Ranchitty (the latter also sometimes called 'Ramchiffy', 'Ralnchitus', 'Rarmarama', and 'Kelbpenty'). Pok and Ranchitty worked the markets of Mun-Mun, and when Tarvu was presented the gift of two gold necklaces by the Mayor of Mun-Mun, he took pity on Pok and Ranchitty and - when the Mayor was looking away - he gave the jewellery to them. text/html 2009-01-20T20:19:05+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=actors_who_have_portrayed_tarvu&rev=1232482745&do=diff Ralph Fiennes - the crescendo scene from Tarvu's Piano. Here is a small selection of actors who have portrayed Lord Tarvu at the cinema and on television. * Roscoe "Fatty" Arbuckle in Tarvunian Follies of 1925 (1925) * Clark Gable in Mr. Wonderful (1940) text/html 2008-10-10T23:10:50+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=alfache&rev=1223676650&do=diff Depiction of one of Alfache's parties. Boyfriend and later life-partner of Oppo, Oobu's son, with whom he established a refuge for orphaned octopuses. Alfache was renowned both for his kindness and his hugely flamboyant parties, which raised money and resources for his beloved orphanage. text/html 2008-10-10T18:45:41+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=alvinni_the_martyr&rev=1223660741&do=diff Alvinni The Martyr was one of the leading followers of Tarvu and disseminators of Tarvuism. Indeed it is said that he was one of the greatest spreaders of the Tarvuist word - travelling as far afield as Ireland and Japan. It is unknown as to what Alvinni did as a profession - some say he was an early physicist, who preceded Einstein's work by nearly 3000 years. Others say he was just a simpleton, who used to collect buckets of water and drink them for bets. Whatever the truth may be, he was a v… text/html 2009-01-07T15:12:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=amzamalvinni_pie&rev=1231341177&do=diff Tarvuist meat pie, named after Amzamiviram and Alvinni the Martyr. These two great figures of Tarvuism were great friends and great cooks, and together they invented the dish. The pie is chiefly made from rabbit, duck, raisins and vanilla, all in a pastry casing. However, the ingredients do change slightly depending on which type of Tarvuist the chef is! text/html 2008-09-20T18:12:55+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=amzamiviram&rev=1221930775&do=diff Pron.'am-zam-ivvi-ram'. Amzamiviram. Detail of a painting by Tony Curtis. Tarvu's best friend and Tarvuist proffet. Sometimes called the Grandfather of Tarvuism. Translated the Holy Text of Tarvuism, The Tarvunty. Amzamiviram was a bellringer, and later bell-designer, who went deaf in later life. The sound of Amzamiviram's tolling bells led Tarvu to dry land during his swim with Oobu the Octopus. Amzamiviram appeared many times in Tarvu's life. It was said that Amzamiviram 'held Tarvu's ea… text/html 2009-01-29T16:05:11+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=andyism&rev=1233245111&do=diff Andyism A pair of Andyists taking turns shouting. Andyism was started by two men, both named Andy (or Andi, or Andie, or Andey, or Andee, records are unclear) who started a religious movement whose (mainly selfish) beliefs were espoused by shouting them loudly, usually in public places. Also, all members had to change their names legally to Andy, except if they were already named Andy, in which case they had to change their name to Her-mon-troppitron (meaning “one who is truly named Andy”).… text/html 2008-09-20T19:27:32+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=arch_prince_malavere_de_felleville&rev=1221935252&do=diff Tarvuist member of the French royal family. Malavere (1730-1780) was a flamboyant prince, who famously held 52 weddings for his first wife, Marie, and 104 for his second, Brigitte (Marie's sister). These were held every week for a period of three years. text/html 2009-01-07T11:26:33+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=arne_asbjorniand&rev=1231327593&do=diff Leader of the Danish Tarvuist Assembly. Is the only living Scandinavian Lord of the Givil and is a keen amateur jeweller. Is the (adopted) father of heavy metal singer Rjonni Asbjørniand. text/html 2009-01-05T15:21:59+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=articulum_of_faith&rev=1231168919&do=diff Members of the Articulum of Faith once gathered naked, until many died of exposure. The Articulum of Faith is central to the Givil and to Tarvuism. It is essentially a 'debating chamber' in which leading former Givilites can discuss particular points of Tarvuist law and scrobuture. It is one of the oldest Tarvuist bodies, originally set up in the 9th century by the Welsh Arch-Pri*stmunty Ffie Thoms. text/html 2008-10-29T14:59:44+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=articulumulite&rev=1225292384&do=diff Term denoting one who is a member of the Articulum of Faith organisation. text/html 2008-09-21T13:14:29+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=baalb&rev=1221999269&do=diff Ancient city, famed for early irrigation projects and huge triangles, that lay somewhere between Turkey and Ethiopia. Tarvu came here after Thelvol Hatty Haynu. After becoming mayor of Baalb for two terms, Tarvu renamed the city, Tarvunia. text/html 2008-09-11T10:10:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=bakersfield_conundrum&rev=1221124228&do=diff Term given to the mystery surrounding Tarvu's great swim north with Oobu the holy octopus, after Tarvu fled the scene of his attempted execution in Baalb. Tarvu followed Oobu for several months (some say over a year) as they swam in completely the wrong direction (they were meant to go west) all the way up to the North Pole. text/html 2009-01-05T15:24:23+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barbara_mendel&rev=1231169063&do=diff Barbara Mendel (1960 - ) is a multi award-winning marketing executive, with a resume that includes such companies as Bilt Management, Henry O Keen Products, Cakil Inc, and Mister Time Piece Extraordinaire Debating Clockface Industries. She now works solely for the Tarvuist Church, as Head of Marketing. text/html 2008-10-16T15:34:14+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barvu&rev=1224167654&do=diff Was this what Barvu looked like? Probably not, but this image of Barvu was used to sell cigarettes, known as 'Barvaccos' in Mexico at the turn of the 20th century. Also known as Barvil, Bunbun, Barhutty, Uvrat, The Undecider, Brumhubst, Decode 9, Sserill, Earl B, The Decalibrator, Unvilh, Umvilh, Invitrion, Hul-Jiv-Mon-Mon-Barvaqqian, The Risible Decrimination Unifier, the Twenty Third, Nuxx-Noxx-Fiddy-Fantaastum, Sutton Bill. text/html 2009-01-05T16:11:47+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barvu_s_prayer&rev=1231171907&do=diff The chief prayer of Barvuism. To become a Barvuist, one must simply say the following prayer out loud (whilst standing on ice). B*rvu B*rvooti, Oboonoo cBooti, Mimmin O'Bibbi noonah, Mdfitty fitty Boonah, Arvu immentitarvu, B*rvu. text/html 2009-01-07T11:36:25+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barvuism&rev=1231328185&do=diff Term denoting the belief system of those who follow Barvu. To become a Barvuist, one need only say Barvu's Prayer. It is not 100% clear as to what Barvuists actually believe, as their holy book, The Barvunty is a pretty imcomprehensible piece of work. On top of this, there are many differing Barvuist sects, each one having different beliefs. text/html 2008-09-21T13:32:36+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barvuist&rev=1222000356&do=diff A Barvuist couple. One who follows Barvu. text/html 2008-09-27T17:03:25+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barvuneral&rev=1222531405&do=diff Barvüneral (L-R Len Døtt, Rjonni Asbjørniand and George Ravenscroft) are a Danish black metal band whose music and philosophy are heavily influenced by Barvu and Barvuism. Lead singer Rjonni Asbjørniand is the son of the current leader of the Danish Tarvunian Assembly, Arne Asbjørniand. text/html 2008-10-16T15:27:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=barvunty&rev=1224167277&do=diff Allegedly written by Barvu himself (during the time when Tarvu became Barvu), the Barvunty sets out Barvuist rules for living. Written from left to right and backwards, the Barvunty was actually most probably written some time after Tarvu left the Earth. Most scholars attribute this work to a Barvuist named 'Shirtless Bub' (Bub-lratittin), who was a well-known pick-pocket at the time. text/html 2009-01-05T15:39:05+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=be_nice&rev=1231169945&do=diff Early Tarvuist poster image, advising people to 'Be Nice' Two word saying that embodies all of Tarvuism. These two words - “Umfitty noonah” ('Be nice') were said by Tarvu in the valley of Mun Mun as he revealed himself as the Lord God. Being nice is the central tenent of Tarvuism. One should always do one's utmost to be nice to others in work, play, family and relationships. text/html 2008-09-06T19:54:19+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=bebbo&rev=1220727259&do=diff Ancient Octish word, meaning “goodbye”. Used by Tarvuists. [Bebbo] text/html 2009-01-05T15:40:44+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=beliefs&rev=1231170044&do=diff In the Tarvuist religion, it is forbidden to eat calamari or octopus Tarvuism, like Judaism, Islam and Christianity is a monotheistic religion - i.e. Tarvuists believe in one God (Tarvu). Like these religions, Tarvuism promotes love for your fellow man, a respect for the family, hard work, hoensty, integrity and faith. text/html 2009-02-18T16:02:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=bellih&rev=1234972977&do=diff Bellih in later life, separating the milk from a flask of tea with his mind. Son of Tellih, a baker, who wanted his son to take over the family bakery. However Bellih did not have his father's natural gift for bread, and under Bellih's management the bakery closed a number of times due to the customers contracting food poisoning from the poorly-prepared bread and manfi cakes, and in most cases giving the customers severe diarrohea. After Bellih pulled his father's decapitated head from a well,… text/html 2008-09-06T20:02:00+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=bellmunty&rev=1220727720&do=diff Traditionally, servant or 'son' of Amzamiviram, the bell-maker (and designer). Each temple has its own Bellmunty. Being Bellmunty of a temple is a very high honour and there are usually long waiting lists. A Bellmunty is required to make his (or her, if she is a Bellimentinu) own costume. The Bellmunty's Bell-hat (the Brove) is made from a mixture of gold, silver, pewter, tin, bronze, brass, nickel, aluminium, iron, copper and bismuth. text/html 2009-01-05T15:43:36+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=bilmtaasium&rev=1231170216&do=diff Bilmtaasium was a good friend of Amzamiviram, having trained under the great proffet as a bell-designer. A tall man (he was over 7 feet tall), Bilmtaasium walked with a stoop, and was said to have been born with a short tail. Bilmtaasium gained the confidence of Tarvu, and became his chief bag carrier. He also helped locate wells, for when Tarvu was thirsty, and went hunting for Tarvu, bringing back much meat for meal times and feastlings. text/html 2008-09-21T13:49:17+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=binni&rev=1222001357&do=diff Sculpture of Binni by Tony Curtis. Wife of Tarvu. Sadly, hardly any information survives regarding her. However it is known that she was very beautiful and very skilled at erotic dancing. She also spoke several languages, including Tarvish, Octish (taught to her by Tarvu), Givilmariu, Tlelrill and Hinfy. text/html 2009-01-06T19:24:27+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=birthdimentiharbinge&rev=1231269867&do=diff Term denoting the marking a Tarvuist's 23rd birthday. In Tarvuism, the number '23' is considered unlucky, and so the day of one's 23rd birthday is considered a sad time. On turning 23, Tarvuists must renounce Barvu and Barvuism publicly in front of their friends and family. This involves a special anti-Barvuist dance and some very loud and aggressive chanting. Since the late 1960's, it has become fashionable, even, to place Birthdimentiharbinge messages in local and national newsapers (in the… text/html 2008-09-22T00:44:41+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=black_barvunty&rev=1222040681&do=diff [Black Barvunty] Punk speed metal band from Sheffield, England. Heavily influenced by Barvüneral and Phil Collins, who joined them on tour in 2004. Discography 2003 - Bamzamiviram! 2004 - No Jacket Required (Live) 2007 - Barvu's Holiday (with Barvüneral) text/html 2008-09-06T20:28:54+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=brad_pitt&rev=1220729334&do=diff William Bradley “Brad” Pitt (born December 18, 1963) is an American actor, film producer, and social activist. He became famous during the mid 1990s after starring in several major Hollywood films. Pitt received a Golden Globe Award and an Academy Award nomination for his role in the 1995 film Twelve Monkeys. Pitt is consistently cited by popular media as one of the most attractive men alive and is regarded as a Hollywood A-lister. His former marriage to actress Jennifer Aniston and previous rel… text/html 2009-01-05T15:49:10+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=bulhus&rev=1231170550&do=diff 'Bulhus - his health restored.' From an illustration from 'Tarvuists Awake!' magazine, 1899 Also known as 'Sensitive Bill', Bulhus was a peach picker who was struck down with numbness (he wasn't able to feel anything - even knife cuts to his body) at the age of 30. text/html 2009-01-05T15:50:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=calamari&rev=1231170628&do=diff It is forbidden within Tarvuism to eat calamari (squid) or octopus, out of respect for Oobu the Holy Octopus who rescued Tarvu from drowning. In recent years, a calamari substitute has emerged (originally from South Korea) called 'Calabunty'. Calabunty tastes similar to calamari, but contains no octopus products whatsoever. It is made chiefly from soya, whey and titluin. text/html 2009-01-06T14:46:51+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=chabernackle&rev=1231253211&do=diff Early 'Jabber-Knaggle'. Tarvuist temple. Sometimes spelt chabbernackle, chabbernaggle, chabernaggle, chintlhentl, tabby-nabby. The holiest site in Tarvuism was the great Chabernackle, known as the Tarvumacklementy. It was built in Tarvunia very soon after Tarvu's Unveiling in Mun-Mun. Unfortunately it is no longer standing. text/html 2009-01-05T15:58:51+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=chal-d-tredmunhl&rev=1231171131&do=diff (B. 1941-) d-TreDmunhl is the central Limbic organiser, devoted to all Tarvuist matters of a limbic and di-limbic nature. Not to be confused with his sister, Huy-d-rHylthum, who works within the Givil on all matters tri and quasi limbic. text/html 2008-10-28T18:50:46+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=charles_barkley&rev=1225219846&do=diff Former American basketball star, Barkley is married to Tarvuist Head of Regions, Simone de Larosse. text/html 2009-01-05T16:04:03+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=chib&rev=1231171443&do=diff The Tarvunian calendar. There are two Octobers. text/html 2009-01-20T17:05:45+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=clark_gable&rev=1232471145&do=diff Clark Gable's teeth were carved from one piece of albino ebony (ivory). Clark Gable (February 1, 1901–November 16, 1960) was an American actor, nicknamed “The King of Hollywood” in his heyday. In 1999, the American Film Institute named Gable seventh among the Greatest Male Stars of All Time. text/html 2009-01-20T19:08:59+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=clint_eastwood&rev=1232478539&do=diff Clint Eastwood: “I may have been Dirty Harry, but Tarvu was Clean Harry.” Clinton “Clint” Eastwood, Jr. (born May 31, 1930) is an Academy Award-winning American actor and filmmaker. Eastwood is best-known as an actor for his tough guy, anti-hero acting roles in action and western films, particularly in the 1960s, 1970s and 1980s. text/html 2008-10-28T11:22:39+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=contents&rev=1225192959&do=diff A brief selection of Tarvuist topics covered by the Tarvupedia. Further reading is encouraged within. * Alvinni the Martyr * Amzamalvinni Pie * Amzamiviram * Baalb * Bakersfield Conundrum * Barvu * Barvuism * 'Be nice' * Bellmunty * Binni * Chabernackle * Erbunty Roundling * The Givil * Hebbo * Hunjavvi Eggs * Iain Bakersfield * Karkippenah * Manfi Cake * Marriage * Mdfunty Funties * Oak Thins * Oobu * Ox-Boxing * Patti-Patti * Patti Patti * … text/html 2009-01-05T16:05:25+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=creation&rev=1231171525&do=diff According to the Tarvunty, Tarvu has always existed. This of course poses the question - where did Tarvu exist prior to the creation of the universes? Unfortunately, our brains are too small to even begin to work this out. Perhaps he lived in Universe C, as many have claimed. text/html 2009-01-05T16:07:24+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=diarrohea&rev=1231171644&do=diff Illness suffered by Lord Tarvu during Thelvol Hatty Haynu. In Tarvuism, it is considered a blessing to suffer from diarrohea (providing it is only mild and non life-threatening). text/html 2009-01-05T17:39:51+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=dr._lahni_t.t._tahnus&rev=1231177191&do=diff Dr Tahnus is Gibbil ty-dyFuntl, or International Head of Tarvuism. Dr Tahnus has never been photographed, and it is in fact unknown as to whether Tahnus is a man or a woman. It is belived that Tahnus is an agrophobic, who does not like to venture outside his/her offices. Nevertheless Tahnus has been credited for making sure all Tarvuist groups around the world are 'speaking from the same page' as it were. text/html 2009-01-21T09:57:23+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=elton_john&rev=1232531843&do=diff Elton Hercules John CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight on 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. In his four-decade career, John has been one of the dominant forces in rock and popular music, especially during the 1970s. text/html 2008-10-06T14:42:05+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=erbu&rev=1223300525&do=diff Ancient Tarvunian name for the planet Earth, which translates as 'smelly hill'. Early Tarvuists thought of the Earth as a giant, strong-smelling hill, with the city of Tarvunia at its peak. The Tarvunian Atlas is known as the Erbunty. text/html 2009-01-06T18:52:58+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=erbuniatum&rev=1231267978&do=diff Coming of age ceremony (cf Baptism, Barmitzvah etc), for Tarvuist children when they reach the age of 9. This age is symbolic, as it represents the age Tarvu was when he stepped on dry land. During the Erbuniatum ceremony the children have to recite sacred texts in Tarvish, bake their own cake, known as an 'Erbunty roundling' (made from flour, egg, sugar, aniseed and onion), which is given to the Priestmunty, who must eat it all in front of the congregation without sipping water. If the Priest… text/html 2009-01-05T16:58:49+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=erbuniatunty&rev=1231174729&do=diff Child of 9, who is undergoing their Erbuniatum (coming of age) ceremony. 9 year old US born Sal McRunahunty was the poster boy for a worldwide Tarvuist advertising campaign throughout the 1950's. Sal went on to become a leading expert on butterfly larvae. text/html 2009-01-05T16:14:31+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=erbunty&rev=1231172071&do=diff The official Tarvunian atlas, in which Tarvunia lies at the epicentre of Earth, or 'Erbu'. The first edition of the Erbunty is credited to Sir Richard Foylylyes (1652-1713), a British land-owner, and champion young magician, who spent fifteen years travelling the globe, before he drew up his atlas. text/html 2009-01-05T16:21:27+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=erbunty_roundling&rev=1231172487&do=diff Early Tarvuist cake factory A cake made by the Erbuniatunty (during their Erbuniatum ceremony), and presented to the Priestmunty. It is traditionally made from flour, egg, sugar, aniseed and onion, although some Tarvuists replace the aniseed with cod, the sugar with cheese, and the flour with flakes of dried beef. text/html 2008-09-21T13:38:13+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=florian_jutburg&rev=1222000693&do=diff Belgian Tarvuist Minister, dog trainer and sometime illegal ox-boxer. Ox-boxing is still legal in the decriminalized zone of Antwerp, where Jutburg owns an express tattooing parlour. text/html 2008-10-14T14:15:29+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=gadd_green&rev=1223990129&do=diff [Gadd Green] 14th-century scientist, alchemist, astronomer and author. Wrote many books which addressed themes of Tarvuism, including: * Tar-voo's Chirche And the Fyrst Givvell * Understondynge Thalmighty Lorde * The Wikked Ick-Nartenne and his Grede * Herkne To What The Man Seyde * Ock-tish; A Treatyse on The Hubble-Bubblyng Speke of the Ockto-pusses and Their Freynds, The Squiddeys text/html 2008-09-21T13:39:08+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=george_harrison&rev=1222000748&do=diff [George Harrison] George Harrison, MBE (25 February 1943 – 29 November 2001) was one of the world's greatest rock guitarists, and undoubtably one of the most famous. He made his name as the lead guitarist with the Beatles, his mournful, lilting guitar sound being much emulated (but rarely mastered) by thousands of Harrison wannabies. Harrison was also a very successful solo artist. text/html 2008-09-24T10:13:16+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=george_mastermind_mastermine&rev=1222247596&do=diff Tarvunian scholar, author of many books and winner of over 80 television quiz shows around the world, including: * 5-4-3-2-1-Answer-Now! * Blind Definition * Beat the Crow * The Haunted House Quiz * Pig Hunt * The Dieting Game * Get On With It * Shhh! - The Quiet Quiz * Spit It Out * Gus's Guillotine * Dzama Rosziewskovna * Come On! * Prince Phillip's Royal Quiz of Quizzes * Oh, Sh*t! I've Forgotten..! * Wilbunty-Ball * Family Calculus * The Sanderson Report … text/html 2008-09-21T13:45:42+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=gibb&rev=1222001142&do=diff Mayor of Baalb, who beat Tarvu by 23 votes. Gibb was a lazy mayor, who spent most of his time throwing orgies at his home with his wife, Hilin. text/html 2009-01-05T16:24:33+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=gill_jidvunny&rev=1231172673&do=diff Along with her colleagues, Samwyn Merris and Henny Tarvint, Jidvunny draws up the list of potential Priestmunty Gibbilinis. This list is then approved by the Givil under secret ballot. Jidvunny's duties are also concerned with the general well-being of Priestmunty Gibbilinis, in particular focusing on issues of cleanliness and bullying. text/html 2008-10-29T16:42:24+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=givil&rev=1225298544&do=diff Could this be the Givil? A black Manhattan skyscraper (left; which appears for two days every year) is another alleged Givil. The Givil is (or are) the Headquarters of Tarvuism. It is surprising that for a religion as open and forthcoming as Tarvuism the location (or locations) of its headquarters are kept totally secret (officially for “security reasons”). It is speculated that the building (or buildings) itself (or themselves) is (are) in Europe, possibly in one of the Untic regions. Some… text/html 2009-01-05T16:29:13+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=givilite&rev=1231172953&do=diff Above: The famous stone of SambilFffe, a replica of which is kissed ceremoniously on the nose, 10,000 times per day, by each member of the Givil. Member of the Givil. text/html 2009-01-05T15:35:46+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=hal-huntl_mukburl&rev=1231169746&do=diff Hal-Huntl Mukburl (1780-1826) was a Dutch Barvuist, who set up the 'Rotterdam Barvuist Family', an early commune, consisting of 50 fellow Barvuists. Mukburl preached free love, as well as free hate, and encouraged his followers (most of them escaped convicts and ex murderers) to commit crimes such as pick-pocketing, and arson. text/html 2008-09-06T20:28:12+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=hebbo&rev=1220729292&do=diff Tarvuist greeting, meaning “hello”. Hebbo is an Octish word, as spoken by the great octopus, Oobu. [Hebbo] text/html 2008-09-21T20:46:13+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=helr-timlosium-mdfitty_taylu&rev=1222026373&do=diff Much feared one-armed local leader of Baalb, who gained his reputation as a fearsome soldier for hire. Helr-Timlosium-MdFitty Taylu (often referred to as simply “MdFitty”) entered local politics after slaying the then local leader, Ti. MdFitty had a large private army, made up of ex prisoners and murderers. He sent a gang of them to intimidate Tarvu, but Tarvu won their hearts and the men turned on MdFitty. MdFitty fled Baalb, and was killed a year later after he slipped off a mountain and lande… text/html 2009-01-05T16:32:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=henny_tarvint&rev=1231173177&do=diff Tarvint (front row on left, also back row, second on right). Trice head of Priestmunty Gibbilinis working under Gill Jidvunny and Samwyn Merris. Henny is in fact two men, born 200 miles apart, with the same heart. text/html 2008-10-28T09:39:41+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=high_pri_stm_nty_jon-john_torvakian&rev=1225186781&do=diff The official portrait of H. P. J-J T'v'k'n. The holiest man in modern Tarvuism, High Pri'stm'nty Jon-John Torvakian is Head of the Givil (or Givil Meni-hentu), which he has presided over since 1990. Not much is known about Torvakian, and a clear photograph of his face has never been published. text/html 2008-09-06T20:36:21+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=horrormorron&rev=1220729781&do=diff Epic poem about the life of Tarvu and the future of Tarvuism written in the 12th century by the dragon scholar Ribbins. Its first chapters consist of episodes from Tarvu's life and later, tales of his acolytes and proffets. More intriguingly, its later sections deal with predictions of future world events (which some scholars use as evidence that Ribbins was mentally dictated to by Tarvu), some of which have already come to pass (although many argue that the predictions are so vague that they … text/html 2008-09-22T00:43:36+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=huig-benthon&rev=1222040616&do=diff Citizen of Baalb. A young woodcutter who was injured by a wild giraffe during celebrations after Tarvu was declared Mayor of Baalb. Tarvu healed the man by touching him, and Huig-Benthon promised never to tell anyone about what had happened. Unfortunately, Huig-Bethon was injured the following year by the same giraffe, and sadly died. text/html 2008-09-06T20:38:50+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=huig-benthonian&rev=1220729930&do=diff One who has been healed through the powers of Tarvuism. text/html 2008-09-21T20:53:59+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=hul-veth&rev=1222026839&do=diff Evil silversmith who set up a rival religion to Tarvuism, called Hulvethism. Hul-Veth was a greedy man, who amassed a fortune from his followers. Hul-Veth cruelly imprisoned Tarvu, and paraded him in chains to the people of Tarvunia, before attempting to execute Tarvu by hanging. Tarvu saved himself by destroying his noose, and turning Hul-Veth into a small pyramid of butter. text/html 2009-01-06T19:10:09+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=hunjavvi_eggs&rev=1231269009&do=diff Above: Eggs specially decorated during the Tarvuist festival of Hunjavvini to symbolise Hunjavvi eggs. The eggs are traditionally emptied, and carefully refilled with pieces of rotting meat. Eggs from a type of bird/mammal that lived mainly in the plains of Ethiopia, in certain parts of Norway, and in the Kent region of south east England. The Hunjavvi was said to have been a cross between a golden eagle and winged-shrew, although most scholars these days say that such a creature could never ha… text/html 2009-01-05T16:57:16+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=huy-d-rhylthum&rev=1231174636&do=diff Cologne, Germany. Birthplace of Huy-d-rHylthum. Sister of Chal-d-Tredmunhl. Head of all tri and quasi limbic Tarvuist matters. d-rHylthum still lives in Cologne and is five times divorced with 11 children. text/html 2008-09-20T18:18:41+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=iain_bakersfield&rev=1221931121&do=diff Scottish theologian and scholar. Iain Bakersfield (1890-1990), became famous as the creator of the 'Bakersfield Conundrum'. Bakersfield, whilst once greatly respected among Tarvuists, saw his reputation diminished somewhat towards the end of his life, due to some rather outlandish and mystical claims that he made. text/html 2009-01-05T16:41:19+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ibbimanumahattimunhunti&rev=1231173679&do=diff Tarvuist word meaning 'happiness, attained through prayer'. The word can also mean 'damp', as in, 'This house suffers from terrible damp. The smell is absolutely disgusting'. text/html 2008-09-06T20:46:59+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ibulanty&rev=1220730419&do=diff Ibulanty- literally meaning 'three cornered hat' - was a giant ice pyramid, created by Tarvu, as a gift to Oobu the octopus for saving him from his execution. Ibulanty - measuring 999 metres in height - was an incredible feat of ice engineering. Inside was a labyrinth of lakes for Oobu and his family to swim in, as well as a nursery for future baby octopuses. In addition, there was a rather clever security fence at the front of the house (made from a line of jelly fish) to ward off predators, as… text/html 2009-01-05T17:02:26+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=il-fitti_finbininam&rev=1231174946&do=diff Above: Il-Fitti (third from left, top row) and his 10 male lovers. Famous undertaker from the time of Tarvu. Il-Fitti was said to have been able to bury 100 men in 100 minutes. Il-Fitti was later hanged for forging apples. text/html 2008-09-06T20:49:38+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=illberini&rev=1220730578&do=diff Young girl who discovered Tellih's head in a well. So shocked was she, that her screams could be heard for hundreds of miles. Illberini later grew up to be a leading Tarvuist and some Tarvuist temples have shrines to her, known as Illberinirinnis. text/html 2008-09-21T19:41:15+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ippi&rev=1222022475&do=diff [Ippi] The beautiful, alluring daughter of Oobu, who had many lovers - both octopus and human. Also, sister of Oppo. text/html 2009-01-05T17:07:55+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=izantu&rev=1231175275&do=diff Deity worshipped by a large proportion of citizens of Baalb. At the time, the populace had literally hundreds of gods, but Izantu was perhaps the main god. In drawings from the time, Izantu was usually depicted as a circle with a thin, long hat on top. Later on he was drawn as a pentagon with long pointy shoes. text/html 2009-01-20T18:22:47+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=james_earl_jones&rev=1232475767&do=diff James Earl Jones (born January 17, 1931) is an American actor of stage and screen, well known for his deep basso voice. Jones portrayed Lord Tarvu in the 1964 Disney movie Be Nice, which mixed live action and animation. The film's saccharine tone and fanciful interpretations of Tarvunian lore have not won it many fans from within the church; indeed, many Tarvuists have taken offence at one particular sequence where it is seems as though Tarvu is having a drug-induced hallucination after he swal… text/html 2009-01-05T17:24:30+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=jeff_hunt&rev=1231176270&do=diff Jeffrey Sebastian Sebastien Sril Srenton Hunt (b 1947) is the personal chauffeur to High Pri*stm*nty Jon-John Torvakian. Because he works so closely and so regularly with Torvakian, many claim that he actually holds more power than a mere driver. T.P.K. Henson - controversial opponent to Tarvuism has claimed that Hunt is actually the same man as Torvakian - a wild, and completely unfounded claim. In fact the Givil sued Henson in 2001 after he made the claim on a US public radio station, but in… text/html 2008-09-21T13:52:29+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=jerbyn_d._diamond&rev=1222001549&do=diff Diamond and his sister. Australian anthropologist, model and fitness expert who has tried to use science to explain some of the superhuman feats attributed to Tarvu. He was the first to suggest that Tarvu had developed gills as a child to enable him to survive for long periods underwater, and, controversially, that he may have somehow absorbed genetic material from Oobu or a member of his family. text/html 2009-01-05T17:29:29+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=jildum_jinny&rev=1231176569&do=diff Early 19th century Turkish Tarvuists re-enact Tarvu's famous dance. Tarvu's famous dance perfomed in the valley of Mun-Mun on his 21st birthday. Tarvu created 100 replicas of himself and danced for all the people gathered. It was said that this was the most amazing dance routine ever created and it lasted for exactly 100 minutes. Some of the moves have been adopted by the Tarvuist faith, and are seen during certain festivities, including of course, Tarvu's Day, held on December 25th (marking Ta… text/html 2009-01-05T17:33:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=karkippenah&rev=1231176808&do=diff Giant woolly sea-tortoise (or 'tortimikeppi') that ate Oobu's father, Oopapa. Tarvu punished all tortimikeppi by making them go extinct. However, there have since been some reports of tortimikeppi spottings, but this has never been proved. During the festival of Occiboonah, children eat cakes called Karkippennies, made from potato, onion and cinammon. text/html 2008-09-06T20:58:02+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=karkippennies&rev=1220731082&do=diff Sweet cakes eaten by children during Occiboonah. Made from onion, milk, potato, and cinammon. These are often shaped like a tortimikeppi (tortoise shaped). text/html 2008-09-06T20:59:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=kathleen_o_onnor&rev=1220731197&do=diff Controversial Tarvunian scholar who posits the theory that Tarvu spent six or so weeks in the small Irish village of Tipperary. In her book, The Tipperarian, she also claims that the Irish names Fitztarvu, Tarvanahan and O'Tarvughessy are directly descended from women Tarvu had affairs with during his stay. text/html 2008-09-08T17:40:00+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=king_ikhnaten&rev=1220892000&do=diff King Ikhnaten was the evil ruler of the kingdom of Ilgop. The King demanded that Tarvu hand over his Prophecies (the Prophecies of Tarvu), but Tarvu tricked the King by presenting him with a false set of parchments. Ikhnaten read that he was to visit an island covered in gold. It was here that he died. King Ikhnaten married his own mother when he was 13 (his mother was 30). This gave rise to the well-known expression 'Mother of Ikhnaten, lover of Ikhnaten'. text/html 2008-09-21T20:38:20+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=king_mathematicus&rev=1222025900&do=diff [King Mathematicus] Benign King, and ruler of Ilgop, who came to throne after the death of the evil King Ikhnaten. He tried to convince Tarvu to become his personal adviser, but despite all efforts, failed. Mathematicus was a skilled flautist, and mathematician. text/html 2009-01-20T20:22:39+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=kirk_douglas&rev=1232482959&do=diff Kirk Douglas insisted on being naked from the waist down when sitting for portraits. Kirk Douglas (born Issur Danielovitch; December 9, 1916) is an Academy Award-nominated American actor and film producer known for the deep cleft in his chin, his gravelly voice and his recurring roles as the kinds of characters Douglas himself once described as “f***ing sons of bitches”. He is the father of Hollywood actor and producer Michael Douglas. He was #17 on the American Film Institute's list of the gre… text/html 2009-01-05T17:35:20+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=lao_menou&rev=1231176920&do=diff As the Chabbernackle Hen-henty, or International Head of Chabernackles, Lao Menou (b. 1907? - ) is one of the most powerful Tarvuists in the world. He works closely with the Chabbernackle Ordermasters, the official chabernackle section of the Givil. text/html 2009-01-05T17:53:52+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=lorraine_henderson&rev=1231178032&do=diff As Official Secretarimunty to High Pri*stm*nty Jon-John Torvakian, Lorraine Henderson has worked for the Head of the Givil for 10 years. Not much is known about Henderson. It is believed that she was born in London, that she is somewhere between the ages of 30 and 80, and that she is married to a man known in Tarvuist circles only as 'Mr Delightful'. text/html 2008-09-30T12:32:45+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=manfi_cake&rev=1222774365&do=diff Sweet cake made from rice, pine nuts, cardamon, sugar and onions. It is traditional for women to propose marriage to men by offering them half a manfi cake. [Manfi Cakes drying on a traditional Manfi rack] text/html 2008-09-20T19:24:50+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=margaret-lionel_lenny&rev=1221935090&do=diff Tarvulogian Author and founder of the Scottish Rationalist Tarvuist Assembly. Her books, many of which are subtitled 'A Sensible Approach to Tarvuism', aim to discount some of the more incredible claims in the Tarvunty. For example, she believes that Tarvu's Great Swims (where he sometimes remained underwater for weeks) should be interpreted metaphorically and not as literal fact. text/html 2009-01-05T17:57:13+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=marriage&rev=1231178233&do=diff Tradition Marriage is considered a duty in Tarvuism. The Tarvunty says 'Marriage maketh men and marriage maketh women. So maketh marriage!' (Cons*de*ations 1/7-9 ALv.) Unlike most patriachal religions, in Tarvuism, it is customary for women to propose to men. text/html 2009-01-05T16:06:37+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=martin_amis&rev=1231171597&do=diff Martin Tarvubius Amis (born 25 August 1949) is a novelist, essayist and short story writer, and the son of noted author Kingsley Amis. He is a functioning Level Four Priestmunty at the Pauper's Shabbernackle in Marylebone, London and is also Life President of the Société et L'Académie du Tarvuisme Français. text/html 2009-01-05T18:01:34+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=mdfunty_funties&rev=1231178494&do=diff Refers to the magnificent cloud spectacle performed by Tarvu as a giant in the valley of Mun-Mun. Mdfunty funties comes from an ancient Octish phrase, meaning 'octopus wind', as octopuses are known to suffer from bouts of severe flatulence, particularly just prior to the mating season. text/html 2009-01-05T18:05:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=michael_louise_and_regina_fforde&rev=1231178728&do=diff Louise and Regina Fforde, pictured in their office, Connecticut, USA. Michael Fforde (born 2002), Louise Fforde (born 1999) and Regina Fforde (born 1998) are a wunderkind sibling group of writers who have written extensively on Tarvuism. Michael, the youngest of the group, provides the artwork. text/html 2008-09-21T20:09:51+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=min-min&rev=1222024191&do=diff [Min-Min] Follower of Tarvu. Min-Min was a dentist and orthodontist who cured Tarvu of a terrible and very painful gum infection. As Tarvu had no money to pay Min-Min, he donated one of his teeth. The tooth ('The Tooth of Tarvu') was put on display in the British Museum, but mysteriously disppeared in 1960.It is thought that it is currently owned by the Sultan of Oman. However, the Sultan has always vigorously denied this. text/html 2008-09-07T09:28:36+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=miracles&rev=1220776116&do=diff text/html 2008-09-08T09:21:40+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=mothbarnu&rev=1220862100&do=diff A style of swimming, thought to have been one of the five strokes invented by lord Tarvu during his Second Great Swim. Also known as the Butterfly Stroke. The current world champions are the Lebo twins, Darren and Derek. They have won joint Gold at three Olympic Games, getting the exact same time on each occasion. text/html 2009-01-05T18:20:33+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=nebbo&rev=1231179633&do=diff Word meaning 'No'. Ancient Octish in origin. Nebbo can also be used to mean 'sedentary', but only when used in writing, and sent as a letter, providing the letter is addressed to three women, the sum total age of whom is over 300. Furthermore, none of the women may be related. text/html 2008-09-08T09:23:44+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=oak_thins&rev=1220862224&do=diff Delicious mini-trees that give a woodland salad its 'crunch'. [Oak Thin] text/html 2009-01-05T18:28:25+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=occiboonah&rev=1231180105&do=diff Occiboonah is one of the happiest days in the Tarvunian calendar. Tarvunian festival marking the period in which Tarvu swam with Oobu and the octopuses in the seas for 9 years. During Occiboonah, Tarvuists are not allowed to use pens (octopus ink is holy) or eat calamari. In fact, Tarvuists do not eat calamari at all, although lapse Tarvuists might do so, just as, say, some unreligious Jews have been known to enjoy bacon when eating in a restaurant or hotel. text/html 2008-09-22T00:38:10+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=octish&rev=1222040290&do=diff ['Hebbo' in Octish] 'Hebbo' in Octish Octish is the ancient language of octopuses, spoken by the holy octopus Oobu and his family. Some Tarvunian words, for instance 'hebbo' and 'bebbo', are Octish in origin. The words are made by the controlled release of air-bubbles, and as such can only be heard underwater. text/html 2008-10-16T15:04:25+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=oobu&rev=1224165865&do=diff Oobu (or Ubu, or Ubb-Ubb) was the octopus who befriended and rescued Tarvu when he landed in the ocean from the Heavens. Oobu appears as a vision to a group of shepherds. He often appeared like this to random people throughout the world. Oobu and his wife Ootati, their children Oppo and Ippi along with Oobu's father Oopapa, kept Tarvu alive by feeding him ink and shrimps. They lived together in the seas for nine years, and Tarvu became a very good swimmer. Oopapa sadly died along the way, be… text/html 2008-09-21T19:34:01+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=oppo&rev=1222022041&do=diff The octopus son of Oobu, and sister of Ippi. A homosexual, he spent most of his life founding an orphanage with his partner, Alfache. text/html 2008-09-08T12:15:59+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ox-boxing&rev=1220872559&do=diff An energetic sport in which a man tries to defeat an ox by punching it; the ox may retaliate by gouging, ramming or trampling. Extra points are awarded for 'Patti-Patti'. Tarvu was an excellent amateur ox-boxer, and Amzamiviram claimed to have knocked out over two hundred oxen in his youth. text/html 2008-09-05T16:58:31+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=patti-patti&rev=1220630311&do=diff 'Patti-Patti', not to be confused with Patti-Patti (the game), is a Tarvunian word meaning flair or panache. King Pillip of Sliny had a great deal of 'Patti-Patti'. text/html 2008-09-05T16:44:00+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=patti-patti_game&rev=1220629440&do=diff A traditional game, similar in some respects to Backgammon and Monopoly. It is played using a board carved out of rock and one counter. Despite its rudimentary appearance, the rules are extremely complicated, requiring the player to make sixteen or eighteen moves per 'turn', all of which must be memorised, and which in turn can be reversed in 'mirror-image' by the opposing player if he has the best 'Patti-Patti' (roughly translated as 'flair'). text/html 2009-01-05T22:15:58+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=pencil_tarvunies&rev=1231193758&do=diff During Occiboonah, (in which Tarvuists recount the story of Tarvu's swim with Oobu) it is forbidden to use ink, as octopus ink is held to be holy in the religion. However certain, more pious, Tarvuists refuse to use ink at all. These are known as 'Pencil Tarvunies' as they only ever write in pencil. text/html 2008-09-21T13:59:20+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=peter_forsyth-henderson&rev=1222001960&do=diff (1945-) Handsome British theologian who has written greatly on Judaism and Tarvuism. Has had a tremendous amount of cosmetic plastic surgery. Is an honorary Duke of the Givil. text/html 2008-09-22T00:44:11+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=phil_collins&rev=1222040651&do=diff [Collins] Philip David Charles Collins (born 30 January 1951) is best known as the lead singer and drummer of English progressive rock group Genesis and as a Grammy and Academy Award-winning solo artist. He has also starred in numerous films. A life-long Tarvuist, Collins recorded an album of Tarvuist songs with former Beatle and fellow Tarvuist, George Harrison in 1993 ('Tarvinu Vinu') reaching no. 11 in the Billboard charts. However, Collins caused an outcry in 2002 when he denounced the rel… text/html 2009-01-05T18:41:40+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=philopophy&rev=1231180900&do=diff Word used by Tarvuists to mean 'philosophy'. It is believed that this spelling began as an error in an early English translation of the Tarvunty, and has, over the years, stuck. text/html 2009-01-05T18:47:09+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=phyll_mdmaster_lawrence&rev=1231181229&do=diff Above: Lawrence presenting a lecture to Harvard math students, entitled 'Tarvunian Mathematics During the Second Age of Reason', 2003. Not much is know about Phyll MdMaster Lawrence, apart from the fact that he is believed to be only 12 years old (as at 2008) and a mathematical genius. text/html 2009-01-05T18:44:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=pok&rev=1231181068&do=diff Beggar of Mun-Mun. One half of 'The Accepters' along with Ranchitty. Despite being a beggar, Pok was a well-loved figure amongst Mun-Munonians because he was a very gifted telthfin player. (A tellthfin was a type of harp that you blew in). Pok died at the age of 101, after swallowing a piece of whale bone at his mother's funeral. text/html 2008-09-20T18:29:43+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=priestmunty&rev=1221931783&do=diff Apprentice Priestmunties. A Tarvuist minister or priest. text/html 2008-09-21T19:25:14+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=priestmunty_gibbilini&rev=1222021514&do=diff Term describing one who has been made an honorary Priestmunty by the Givil. The decision as to who should become a Priestmunty Gibbilini (or 'Gibbilini' for short) is made by secret ballot, amongst Givil members. Ordinations of Gibbilinis are becoming rarer and rarer each year. See chart below. text/html 2008-09-22T17:29:48+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=prij_al-hunty&rev=1222100988&do=diff Tunisian scholar (1961- ) who put forward the theory of the 16 universes in his book 'Universarium Tarvuutium'. Most Tarvuists - including the members of the Givil - found the ideas put forward to be verging on the heretical. However some Tarvuist scholars, most notably the Scottish Rationalist Tarvuist Assembly and members of the T.V.K.L (the Tarvuist Ventol Kapon Limiters) have taken up Al-Hunty's ideas with some aplomb. text/html 2009-01-05T18:51:27+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=proffet&rev=1231181487&do=diff Tarvuist term for a prophet. Sometimes spelt 'profett'. Above: 'Headless Handini', early Tarvunian proffet, known for his ability to make his enemies' heads disappear, and then re-appear, attached to walls and stairs, whenever he got angry. text/html 2009-01-05T18:55:27+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=proffets_of_tarvuism&rev=1231181727&do=diff There are several Tarvuist proffets (prophets), namely: Amzamiviram - Tarvu's best friend, and scribe of the Tarvunty. He is much revered, and the Bellmunty in every chabernackle is dedicated to his memory. Binni - Tarvu's beautiful wife. Not much is known of her. However she is meant to have been the most beautiful woman that ever lived and shall ever live. According to Alvinni the Martyr “her natural perfume was ravishing” (Alvinni's Beautiful Memoirs). As a woman, she is sometimes referred … text/html 2010-05-27T10:41:29+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=prophecies_of_tarvu&rev=1274953289&do=diff Parchments, dictated by Tarvu to Amzamiviram. They purported to “predict everything that would happen, for ever”. (Pr*D'T**ns, 0,99-a.4) Some notable predictions contained therein: * The invention and demise of Concorde * The exact date of Albert Einstein's puberty text/html 2009-01-21T08:15:38+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ralph_fiennes&rev=1232525738&do=diff Ralph Nathaniel Twisleton-Wykeham-Fiennes (pronounced ˈReighf Finds'; born 22 December 1962) is an English actor. He has appeared in films such as Schindler's List, Quiz Show, The English Patient, Oscar and Lucinda, Red Dragon, Tarvu's Piano, Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit, and the Harry Potter films. text/html 2009-01-05T19:11:02+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ranchitty&rev=1231182662&do=diff Ranchitty - also known as Ramchiffy, Ralnchitus, Rarmarama, Kelbpenty - was the beggar friend of fellow beggar, Pok. Ranchitty was a very talented beggar (if talented is the best word!), as he could charm just about all the ladies of Mun-Mun into giving him coins. In fact, some say that that is not all he charmed them into giving (i.e their bodies). text/html 2009-01-05T19:13:54+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=rantini&rev=1231182834&do=diff A beverage made from milk and raisins. Drunk on high holidays by Tarvuists, and also during wedding ceremonies. Sometimes pepper is added to taste. text/html 2008-09-21T14:04:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=ribbins&rev=1222002297&do=diff [Ribbins] Tarvunian scholar (1109-1180) active in Chichester during the twelfth century. Was a contemporary of Thomas Becket, with whom he engaged in a lively religious debate throughout his life. Ribbins wrote many Tarvunian works, including the epic poem Horrormorron. text/html 2009-01-20T19:39:44+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=robin_williams&rev=1232480384&do=diff Williams, hypnotized in 1996. An actor and comedian known for his hyperactive and improvisational style, Williams was born in Chicago, Illinois on 21 July 1952. Williams played Tarvu in an ill-fated movie from 1981, You're The Best - a sickly-sweet modern-day retelling of the Tarvu story wherein Tarvu returns with a mission: to kiss every man, woman and child on Earth (Erbu). The film's major downfall, however, was to have every spoken line overdubbed with Morse Code, a short-lived fad from th… text/html 2009-01-20T16:43:06+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=roscoe_fatty_arbuckle&rev=1232469786&do=diff Roscoe was also known as “Titty” Arbuckle. Roscoe Conkling “Fatty” Arbuckle (March 24, 1887 – June 29, 1933) was an American silent film comedian, director, and screenwriter. He wrote and starred in the musical film Tarvunian Follies of 1925, which featured Tarvuist jazz songs and skits, and comic dramatizations of episodes from Tarvu's life, in which the Lord (played by Arbuckle) is depicted in blackface. The film is credited with converting president Calvin Coolidge to Tarvuism - an ironic f… text/html 2008-09-21T13:04:48+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=samson_hibbert&rev=1221998688&do=diff Samson Hibbert (1760-1851) was a leading British Tarvuist scholar and writer. Hibbert was brought up in Nottingham, England, the son of a brass tap maker, before moving to Cardiff in Wales, where he really made his name. Hibbert spread the word of Tarvuism through fiery speeches (he would literally set fire to his clothes and get undressed quickly before being burnt to show his faith). Hibbert also used to wear a rose in each of his pinholes, one on each lapel, and became known locally as 'Pinh… text/html 2009-01-05T19:19:21+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=samwyn_merris&rev=1231183161&do=diff Vice Head of Priestmunty Gibbilinis. Samwym is a former ox-boxing champion, with over 900 OKO's (Ox Knock Outs). text/html 2009-01-05T19:20:59+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=scottish_rationalist_tarvuist_assembly&rev=1231183259&do=diff Controversial Tarvuist assembly set up in 1992 by modernist Tarvuist thinker,Margaret-Lionel Lenny. The assembly's HQ is situated in Edinburgh, on the site of a former sweet factory (responsible for such well-known confectionary as 'Little Owls' and 'Boomerang Billys'). text/html 2009-01-05T19:30:11+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=simone_de_larosse&rev=1231183811&do=diff de Larosse is the Tarvuist Head of Regions. Her exact duties, however are not entirely clear, as it has never been fully explained as to how her role differs from that of Dr. Lahni T.T. Tahnus, the Gibbil ty-dFuntl, or International Director of Tarvuism. text/html 2009-01-05T17:31:38+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=sir_john_willoughbilloughby&rev=1231176698&do=diff Early, ugly, Chabbernackle Ordermaster (1760-1870) text/html 2009-01-20T20:26:31+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=sir_laurence_olivier&rev=1232483191&do=diff Laurence Olivier. Hand-painted latex sculpture by Tony Curtis. Laurence Kerr Olivier, Baron Olivier, OM (22 May 1907 – 11 July 1989) was an English actor, director, and producer. His most notable role was portraying Lord Tarvu in Lord of The Tarvunty (1940), whom he played with a staccato, lisping voice which continues to be copied by impressionists today. text/html 2009-02-18T16:16:38+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=sobby&rev=1234973798&do=diff Sobby, the half-human, half-octopus prostitute, displays his wares to passersby. The story of Sobby, a wretched member of the mongrel Humapus or 'jelly-legs' caste of octopoid humans (Homo Cephalopodus), is well-known in Tarvuism. In ancient Baalb, octopuses were prized by men for giving a peculiarly intense sexual experience, and many men preferred using them to even the most beautiful human prostitutes, even though they were often far pricier. Some men even married octopuses who had previousl… text/html 2008-10-28T11:21:37+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=start&rev=1225192897&do=diff Welcome to the Tarvupedia, the “online” encyclopedia all about our Lord Tarvu, Tarvuism, and who's who in the religion. We do hope you enjoy reading it, and hope you tell all your friends, family and colleagues all about the Tarvupedia. Don't forget: The Tarvupedia will be regularly updated, so do remember to come and visit every day! text/html 2008-10-30T12:49:53+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=t.p.k._henson&rev=1225370993&do=diff Controversial figure in the world of Tarvuism. A former Tarvuist Priestmunty, Henson (b. Tarvus [later Terry] Peter Knowlesly Henson 1937, Wisconsin, USA) turned his back on Tarvuism in 1984 after a major disagreement with the higher priests of Tarvuism regarding his finances. text/html 2009-01-05T20:38:42+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=t.v.k.l&rev=1231187922&do=diff The Tarvuist Ventol Kapon Limiters (T.V.K.L) are an alliance of American, Canadian and Norwegian Tarvuist scholars, heavily influenced by the work of the Scottish Rationalist Tarvuist Assembly. Led by the charismatic, Toin Ventol Kapon (real name 'Mike McPhearson'), the T.V.K.L have caused some controversy due to a number of attention grabbing media stunts they have carried out in the past. text/html 2010-05-27T10:15:06+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvu&rev=1274951706&do=diff Tarvu (sometimes referred to as Lord Tarvu, Our Saviour, Master of The Tarvunty, His Brilliance, Giver of the Word, Giver of Words, Tebbu, Thebbu, Thaddu, Ah-Haut, Tinvu, Tarh-Shenty, Sheppartarvi, Mr. Invisible, Tarvoobi, Mr. 9, His Loveliness, Friend of Amzamiviram, Octunatatov, The Dude, Uvrab, The Non-Worrier, The Negative Barvu, Saviour of the Seas, Lord Belly-Fonty, Octish Warrior, Lord of Octopuses, The King of Sex, He-Him, Mike Fantastic, The Tipperarian) came to Earth (Erbu) 3,000 to 3,… text/html 2009-01-05T19:43:08+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvu_s_day&rev=1231184588&do=diff Also known as 'Tarvu Hen-Henty', Tarvu's Day is the holiest day in the Tarvuist calendar, held on December 25th - the same day as Christmas Day. Tarvu's Day marks the day on which Tarvu announced to the people of Mun-Mun that he was the Lord. It is a day of celebration, on which friends and family gather. Together they dance, just as Tarvu performed his dance in the form of 100 replicas of himself, eat, drink and generally get very merry! text/html 2009-01-05T19:45:33+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvu_s_prayer&rev=1231184733&do=diff The most important prayer in Tarvuism is 'Tarvu's Prayer' ('Tlentifini Marhaaysu'). It is said when you wake up, go to bed, and and after you have visited the toilet. Here is the prayer: Tarvu tarvooti, Oboonoo cTooti, Mimmin O'tibbi noonah, Mdfitty fitty noonah, Arvu immentiBarvu, Tarvu. text/html 2009-01-05T15:03:06+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvuism&rev=1231167786&do=diff What is Tarvuism? Tarvuism is a world religion that is over 3000 years old. It holds that there is one God - Tarvu - who created the two universes - Universe A and Universe B. We live in Universe B. Tarvuism is one of the oldest and largest monotheisitic religion in the world. text/html 2009-01-05T21:32:35+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvuism_today&rev=1231191155&do=diff Tarvuism is a flourishing, fast-growing religion, that has spread to just about every country in the world (with the exception of Chad). The Tarvunty - the holy book of Tarvuism - has been printed in over 150 languages, and is one of the biggest selling books of all time. text/html 2008-09-30T12:53:12+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvuist&rev=1222775592&do=diff Typical Tarvuists. Descriptive of one who is a follower of Tarvuism. text/html 2008-10-30T12:48:37+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvumacklementy&rev=1225370917&do=diff Perhaps the holiest site in Tarvuism. The great Chabernackle, the Tarvumacklementy was built in Tarvunia very soon after Tarvu's Unveiling in Mun-Mun. The building was said to have been the “most beautiful construction there has ever, is ever and will ever have had been” ('Alvinni's Beautiful Memoirs'). It could seat over 3000 worshippers, and had a giant feasting room, as well as an early form of a toilet (a box filled with straw and worms). Tarvu delivered his speeches from the front of the g… text/html 2008-09-21T14:03:54+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvunia&rev=1222002234&do=diff Ancient city founded by Lord Tarvu, formerly known as Baalb. The exact location is unknown but is believed to lie somewhere between Turkey and Ethiopia. Tarvu settled in Baalb on his forteenth birthday, and in fact had his forteenth birthday party there. He quickly established himself as a valued member of the community, becoming greatly involved in civic matters. At the age of nineteen he became the youngest person to run for mayor of Baalb but was narrowly beaten by the incumbent, Gibb. Gibb,… text/html 2009-01-05T19:49:03+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvunian&rev=1231184943&do=diff The language spoken by Tarvu, Amzamiviram and people of Tarvunia; the language which the Tarvunty was originally written in. Tarvunian is a very beautiful and complex language. It has the most characters of any language, ancient or modern: over 400,000 have been identified, compared to say, English, which has only 26. text/html 2009-01-05T20:01:45+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvunical_department_for_interfaith_dialogue&rev=1231185705&do=diff Since its inception in 1901, the Tarvunical Department for Interfaith Dialogue has been instrumental in the bringing together of Jews, Muslims, Hindus and Christians - in fact all religions - with Tarvuists. In 1962, Pope John XXIII became the first Pope to visit a Chabernackle, where he met the then Head of the Tarvuist Church Pri*stm*unty Tunny Hulthothulus. The meeting was even celebrated in a set of Italian stamps. text/html 2009-01-21T06:10:37+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvunty&rev=1232518237&do=diff The Tarvunty is the Holy Text of Tarvuism. It was dictated in Tarvish (Classical Tarvunian) by Lord Tarvu to his friend, the proffet Amzamiviram, who translated it into five languages. [A group of Tarvunties] A group of Tarvunties, including (bottom of pile on left) the famous 'Glory to Amzamiviram' edition, 1856. text/html 2008-09-22T17:32:19+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvupia&rev=1222101139&do=diff Heaven, the afterlife. After you pass away, your soul spends 9 years in the oceans. If you survive, spiritually, you are allowed to go to Tarvupia. Tarvuists believe that Tarvupia is a giant sphere that is larger than the universe itself. It is made up of infinity-minus-one concentric circles, each one leading, eventually to Tarvu (who is positioned neatly at the centre). text/html 2009-01-05T20:25:51+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tebberunty&rev=1231187151&do=diff Tarvuist judge. Also sometimes affectionately known as 'Southampton Johnnies'. Above: Revered 19th century Tebberunty, Karl Hilf-kKamrartey, who claimed that he could 'sense guilt' merely by getting others to whisper into his mouth. text/html 2009-01-29T16:09:30+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tellih&rev=1233245370&do=diff Former baker, and manager of a bakery in Baalb where Tarvu worked during puberty. The bakery was a very popular place for Baalbians, and the bread was known for miles around. Unfortunately Tellih was a very bad-tempered man (some now believe he may have been autistic) who beat Tarvu after Tarvu inadvertantly fell asleep and caused all the bread to burn. The day after the beating, Tellih drowned in a well, which he fell into. While he fell, his head was severed from his neck. It was said that whe… text/html 2008-09-23T19:17:53+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tementy&rev=1222193873&do=diff Also known as Temiminimenty. Tementy was a disciple of Tarvu, who lived in Baalb (later renamed Tarvunia). Tementy worked as a bridge-builder, although he was involved in a scandal regarding a collapsing bridge which resulted in the death of 4 oxen. Faced with the death penalty (drowning in blood), Tementy turned to Tarvu for help, as Tarvu was adept in settling matters of law and legal disputes.// Tarvu argued that the weight of the bridge was 4444 times that of the 4 oxen, and that there was j… text/html 2009-02-18T16:15:22+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_adventures_of_inspector_sobby&rev=1234973722&do=diff Inspector Sobby, voiced by Gérard Depardieu. A popular children's cartoon series which has appeared on Télévision Française 1 since 1985. Its eponymous character is a half-human, half-octopus who squirts ink on his foes. He is clearly based on the Apoffle Sobby, although in the cartoon the character does not have any history of prostitution. text/html 2009-01-05T15:54:56+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_chabbernackle_ordermasters&rev=1231170896&do=diff Sacred symbol of the Chabbernackle Ordermasters, based on a design by Florence Nightingale's brother, Laurence Nightingale. A body of 40 Gilvilites who look after chabernackles worldwide. They are headed by Lao Menou, who is Chabbernackle Hen-henty (International Head of Chabernackles). text/html 2009-01-05T16:55:31+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_institute_for_the_defence_of_law&rev=1231174531&do=diff Givilite grouping. Duties unknown. However it is believed that they may be concerned with matters of Tarvil-shen-hunty. Above: the famous 18th century Tarvushenahenty clock, that greets visitors to the Institute for the Defence of Law headquarters in Rotterdam, Holland. The clock's hour arm works at double speed, whilst the minute arm works at thirty times the speed. text/html 2009-01-05T18:33:47+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_oobu_brotherhood&rev=1231180427&do=diff Brothermunty Pierre de Fil, founder of The Oobu Brotherhood Realising that there was no one central body that set the dates for Tarvuist festivals, Brothermunty Pierre de Fil of Lyons, set up The Oobu Brotherhood in 1140. The Brotherhood comprised a group of astrologers and mathematicians, who formulated what has become known the 'Chib', or Tarvunian calendar. text/html 2009-01-05T18:37:11+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_oobuists&rev=1231180631&do=diff The Oobuists are devout followers of Oobu the Octopus, who claim that Oobu and Tarvu are in fact the same being. They have lobbied for many years for Oobu to be considered as holy as Tarvu. The group is led by Ytranius MdLuntl, a Latvian Tarvuist, and former member of the Givil. text/html 2009-01-05T19:03:58+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_quarterly_amzamiviram_dependence_unit&rev=1231182238&do=diff The Quarterly Amzamiviram Dependence Unit (or Q.A.D.U) is devoted entirely to the study of the life and works of the proffet Amzamiviram. Q.A.D.U comprises Tarvuist scholars and priestmunties who meet quarterly all over the world (usually in Rotterdam) to debate Amzamiviramic law. text/html 2009-01-05T19:15:45+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_rota&rev=1231182945&do=diff Tarvuist judicial grouping headed by nine Tebberunties who debate Tarvuist and Amzamiviramic law. Meetings are held every 6 years with High Pri'stm'nty Jon-John Torvakian. The head of the Rota is unknown, but is regularly referred to as 'K908'. text/html 2009-01-05T19:35:21+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_sistema_of_the_tarvunty&rev=1231184121&do=diff Women play an important part in modern-day Tarvuism. There are female priestmunties and Givilites, as well as women workers in various Tarvuist-run organisations throughout the world. The Sistema of the Tarvunty is a female only group, who discuss issues of Tarvunic theology. For instance, attitudes towards marriage, children and the female role within the family and the modern world. text/html 2009-01-05T19:38:31+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_sril_martlin_brothers&rev=1231184311&do=diff Above: The official Tarvuist image of the Sril Martlin brothers. Identical twin brothers, Linton and Linterm Sril Martlin (b 1953) are Vice Heads (or 'Givil mahetma-henny-hen-hutty-hoonah') of the Givil. Born in Canada and Norway, Linton and Linterm are extremely close to High Pri*stm*nty Jon-John Torvakian. Linterm is slightly closer, as he reports to Torvakian on a thrice daily basis, whilst his brother, Linton, does so only twice daily. In addition, Linterm is said to dine with Torvakian… text/html 2009-01-05T19:59:35+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_tarvunical_commission&rev=1231185575&do=diff It is completely unknown as to what The Tarvunical Commission does. All that is known is that it comprises roughly 30 Tarvuists. Where they meet and when is a mystery. T.P.K. Henson - former Tarvuist and now arch critic of the religion - made an outrageous claim in 1990 that the Commission was in fact made up of 'masturbators'. He was sued by the Givil. text/html 2009-01-05T20:08:46+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_tarvunical_undoing&rev=1231186126&do=diff The Great Penic Building in Chicago, one of the many buldings rumoured to belong to he T.U. Givilite grouping made up of around 30 members. Duties unknown. In the 2007 financial report from the Givil, it stated that The Tarvunical Undoing was paid $401.86 for 'Services pertaining to 85/86cc'. text/html 2009-01-05T16:05:14+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=the_union_of_tarvuist_peoples&rev=1231171514&do=diff Set up in 1945, in the shadow of the Second World War, the Union of Tarvuist Peoples was originally a charitable group, raising money for Tarvuist orphans. Nowadays the Union is still a charity but has branched out, putting on fund-rasing events (often with the help of the Tibbi Manti Hutmanahun) to raise money for all manners of Tarvuist - and non Tarvuist causes. text/html 2009-01-06T19:00:08+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=thelvol_hatty_haynu&rev=1231268408&do=diff Also known as The Time of Transit, and Transitumini, Thelvol Hatty Haynu marks the time during which Tarvu travelled for 5 years, between the ages of 9 and 14. It is not clear as to where he went exactly. Tarvu suffered stomach illness during this time and had bad diarrohea. text/html 2009-01-05T22:23:55+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=thessle&rev=1231194235&do=diff Cot-like construction, used at the end of the Erbuniatum ceremony, in which the Erbuniatunty is tucked in and rocked to sleep. Traditionally made from bamboo, but nowadays more commonly made from wood, wood veneer or even plastic. Above: 17th century thessle. Despite its appearance, this device was actually quite uncomfortable. text/html 2009-01-05T20:30:39+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=thumbi&rev=1231187439&do=diff Jailer of Baalb. A giant of a man (he was reputedly over 9 feet tall), Thumbi had a horrible cruel streak, and enacted many vicious punishments on his victims. One of his methods involved covering a prisoner in burning honey, and releasing bees into the cell (the victim would suffer terrible burns and stings). text/html 2009-01-05T20:34:47+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tibbi_manti_hutmanahun&rev=1231187687&do=diff Commonly known as 'Fools and Alms', the Tibbi Manti Hutmanahun are a Tarvuist organisation devoted to Tarvuic entertainment. Tibbi Manti Hutmanahun was set up in 1911 by flamboyant Tarvuist George 'Centrefold' Ben-Ennet, in New York. Starting with only $10 in his pocket, he set out to “create the most perfect entertainment grouping in all of religious history” (from 'George By Name': Memories of a Tarvu's Boy, Carlton press, 1957). text/html 2009-01-06T18:57:30+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=transitumini&rev=1231268250&do=diff Five year period of Tarvu's travel between the ages of 9 - 14, also known as Thelvol Hatty Haynu. He hid under camels and saw many fires lit by arsonists. Above: Illustration of Tarvu's favourite camel, 'Dibbi', from 'Tarvu As I Would Have liked to Have Known Him,' by Charles Tinkworthy, Goulton and Goutlon Press, 1932. text/html 2009-01-05T20:43:19+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=two_words_of_tarvu&rev=1231188199&do=diff Early 12th century English Tarvuist manuscript, which discusses ovulation, and extols the virtues of 'being nice' The central tenet of Tarvuism, the Two Words of Tarvu are, “Umfitty noonah”. This translates as ”Be nice.” From this short exchange has come the Tarvuist mantra ”Be nice. But if you can't be nice, be quite nice”. This is often heard during religious services (“Umfitty noonah, telebunty nop nop, talvim umfitty tenebim noonah”). text/html 2008-09-21T20:36:25+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=uckob&rev=1222025785&do=diff Uckob was the layabout brother of the proffet Amzamiviram. A drunkard and gambler, Uckob stole The Prophecies of Tarvu and was punished by Tarvu by having his tongue turned into a poisonous snake which bit him to - what was believed at the time - death. Actually, at the time, people believed he had died. This is because Uckob vanished for several years, but he actually only lost his leg from the bite. He was to return several years later, disrupting an important mayoral meeting (that Tarvu was h… text/html 2009-01-05T20:58:44+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=who_s_who_in_tarvuism&rev=1231189124&do=diff Tarvuism has a very particular - some say, complicated - hierarchy. This is perhaps natural for a world religion. Here are some of the main figures and official groupings in Tarvuism. THE GIVIL High Pri'stm'nty Jon-John Torvakian Givil Meni-hentu - (Head of the Givil) text/html 2009-01-05T21:02:57+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=y-lyl&rev=1231189377&do=diff Position unknown. Syntax error. 10001 001 100 10001 text/html 2008-09-21T20:47:36+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=yarvin&rev=1222026456&do=diff Full name Yarvini k'Limnorada mel-Hunti Hujmun, Yarvin was a manure collector who defied Tarvu at the time of his great unveiling as the Lord. Yarvin mocked Tarvu, calling him “a drunk” and an “a**hole”. Yarvin became known as Yarvin the Ignorer, and his band of followers, 'the Unsee-ers'. text/html 2009-01-05T21:00:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=yebbo&rev=1231189228&do=diff Ancient Octish word for 'Yes'. Can also mean 'sedentary' when used as an adjective (but only when talking to 3 men or more, outside at night) text/html 2008-09-21T19:32:28+01:00 http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=yulsen_the_devout&rev=1222021948&do=diff Devout Tarvuist Priestmunty, probably born in Morocco c. 2975 BC. Yulsen spread the word of Tarvuism through his energetic speeches, accompanied by fire-eating and mass-water drinking (it was said that Yulsen could drink an entire barrel of water in under 10 seconds).